My Eating Disorder Story (Part 2)

If you read my Part 1 Story, I thank you! It means a lot to be able to share my story and share to others my past and how it’s led me to where I am now!

Today’s post is part 2 of my story, and it goes into a little about when I struggled with Orthorexia.

First off, Orthorexia is, in a nutshell, carrying healthy eating and exercise too far.

In August of 2010, I started my college journey at Belmont University. Soon into my first year, I decided to pick up running. I knew I was not playing on the tennis team at Belmont, so I needed to fill in my exercise with something different.

I started off with small laps around the soccer practice field right outside of the dorm buildings. I started growing a love for running and how it made me feel.

Not long after, I decided I would start picking up my mileage and training to run my first half marathon. I also tried my first cycle class to mix things up and instantly fell in love!!

After my first half marathon, I continued running, signing up for races, and still enjoying friendships and classes at Belmont.

It wasn’t long, though, until I got into some old habits, but this time it wasn’t starving myself…it was overexercising and under eating…which is technically what I was doing before…but I was just barely eating enough to get by.

I started slimming up more and more, and it got to the point where I would try to exercise 2 times a day, along with fitting in my classes, work, etc.

If it wasn’t running first thing in the morning, it was running in the afternoon. It was always running or a cycle class.

By my best friend’s wedding in March of 2013, I had gotten down to 117 pounds. Even though that’s more than the 86 I had gotten down to in middle school, this was still dangerously low.

I had lost my period for several months…but to me, I enjoyed not having to deal with it. I was back to a very unhealthy relationship with food.

I even remember many many mornings I would wake up and make broccoli for breakfast because my mindset was:

1.It’s Veggies

2.It’s Low calorie

I would go for the most low calorie things I could grab, but have it spread out during the day to make it appear I ate enough. I was barely getting 1200 calories. For a girl my age at the time, and exercising as much as I was, it was not near enough to fuel my body properly.

It was towards the end of my senior year at Belmont that even my own roommates confronted me about my behavior. By the time we graduated I was starting to get back into a healthier relationship with food.

Fast forward to January 2018 when I started my Crossfit journey. I wasn’t running the distances that I used to and I dabbled in making my own strength training workouts. I had just come out of a very toxic relationship, and crossfit was a way to not only exert built up energy and frustration, but to build up my strength…both physically and mentally.

Since I’ve started I have in fact built up my strength mentally and physically…way beyond what I thought I was capable of achieving.

Fitness now is a way of being healthy and feeling strong and confident, not just a way to burn calories to lose weight or be skinny.

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